Autism and Anxiety: 5 Ways to Be a Support

To someone with autism spectrum disorder (ASD), an anxiety burst feels like an internal hurricane: overwhelming, devastating, and intense. The only response is to batten down the hatches and shut down, or to let the hurricane out to express itself in a variety of challenging behaviours, including injury to self and others.

As we support individuals with ASD, we need to become aware the moment the wind starts shifting. When we do this, we can offer support at the earliest stages, and prompt recovery and self-regulation strategies that will often prevent the storm entirely.

The 5 Most Important Things to Think About for Those with Autism and Anxiety

1. Personal Nonreactivity

Anxiety bursts can be scary or involve behaviour that makes you uncomfortable. If you are in a support role, it is imperative that you remain a calm, non-anxious presence. Become aware of what triggers you and practice your own self-regulation techniques to recover from fight/flight responses. Managing your own response and ensuring that you aren’t acting out of embarrassment, disgust, or fear will keep a situation neutral and focused on the individual.

2. The Function of Anxiety

It is easy to focus on the behaviour that results from anxiety rather than the function of it, but we need to keep our eyes on what the individual is trying to get or communicate. Look behind the behaviour to find the trigger of the anxiety. Tend to the person’s physical and sensory needs if they are not feeling safe, offer emotional support and reassurance if they need to feel accepted, and help the person gain confidence in problem-solving, organizing, or learning if they feel incompetent.

3. Building Capacity

We often work so hard to protect the people we support from being overwhelmed that we err on the side of asking too little of them. However, true support will focus on building capacity. This will help those with autism build cognitive self-regulation and increase their ability to handle anxiety without being overwhelmed by it.

Focus on teaching recovery strategies and self-awareness so the individual learn to identify when things are getting to be too much and make choices about how to respond before they go into fight or flight. When you are teaching this, take micro-steps – tiny little challenges – instead of big leaps, and offer concrete support.

4. Acting as a GPS

During an anxiety burst, there is simply too much information to process. The individual needs you to act as a sort of GPS system – calm, prompting the next action, recalculating without judgement if you get off course.

Your role is to make the choice of what information is important in that moment, whether it is a verbal command like “Sit down” or “Take a deep breath,” a physical redirection to a place of safety, or a visual schedule that shows the next step. Stay focused on what is relevant in that moment and what is most effective to help that person get what they need. Visuals and simple words are often more effective than “why” questions or any information that requires processing.

5. Planning for the Future

During an anxiety burst, you have to respond to the immediate need and help the person navigate their way through. However, during times of calm, it is important to teach physical, cognitive, and emotional self-regulation skills so the individual has more tools to bring with them the next time they feel anxious.

Start by teaching a variety of breathing techniques. Deep pressure and body awareness help the individual explore their own body as a resource that can help them feel calm. Introduce the idea of emotions and what people need to help them process. Many of us have been taught that if we are feeling something slightly uncomfortable, we need a break. However, there are many other ways of processing that might actually be more effective. Teach cognitive self-regulation strategies like task completion and planning.

These five ideas will help de-escalate an anxiety burst and help the individual experience fewer episodes in the long term. Instead of looking for the next hurricane, we can focus on learning, enjoyment, and engagement.

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